Blogs

When a child faces cancer, their emotional journey is just as important as their physical one. Supporting them effectively requires understanding, empathy, and tailored strategies. In this blog, let me attempt answers to some of the most pressing questions caregivers often ask.

1. How do children process cancer differently from adults?

Children’s understanding, fears, and coping mechanisms are closely tied to their developmental stage. For example, younger children might not fully comprehend the concept of illness, while older kids and teenagers may have more complex fears, like missing out on school or social activities. Some children express their concerns openly, while others might withdraw or show changes in behaviour. It’s essential to remember there’s no “right” way for a child to respond to cancer—each child’s journey is unique. Observing and responding to their cues with patience and empathy is key.

2. How do I communicate with my child about their diagnosis?

Honest communication is crucial, but it needs to be age-appropriate and sensitive. Younger children might benefit from simple analogies, such as explaining cancer as "good cells and bad cells fighting." For school-aged children, a bit more detail can help them understand, while teenagers often prefer directness and being included in discussions about their treatment. Regardless of their age, share information gradually to avoid overwhelming them, and always answer their questions truthfully—even if the answer is, “I don’t know.” Creating private, quiet moments for conversations can encourage them to open up when they’re ready.

3. How do I use appropriate language to explain cancer to my child?

Using age-appropriate language is vital when discussing cancer with children. For younger children aged 3-6, use simple analogies like "good cells and bad cells fighting inside the body" to explain the illness. School-aged children (7-12) may need more detailled but still clear and digestible explanations. Teenagers, on the other hand, often prefer direct communication and appreciate being involved in discussions about their treatment and recovery. Tailoring your language to their level of understanding ensures clarity and reduces unnecessary fear.

4. How can I encourage my child to express their feelings?

Expression can take many forms beyond just words, and every child has their own way of processing emotions. Encourage creativity by providing art supplies for drawing or painting. Journaling can be a powerful outlet for older children, while younger kids might find comfort in storytelling or playing with puppets. Physical activities, such as walking or gentle play, can help release pent-up emotions, provided they’re within medical guidelines. It’s also important to validate all their emotions—whether it’s fear, anger, or sadness and create a safe space where they feel understood.

5. How do I maintain normalcy in my child’s life during treatment?

Maintaining normalcy can be grounding for children during such a turbulent time. While routines might need to adapt, small efforts to preserve normal life can have a big impact. Stick to regular meal and bedtime schedules whenever possible. Continue family traditions and favourite activities, even if they need to be modified for their energy levels. Stay connected with teachers to arrange remote learning and video calls with classmates, so your child still feels part of their peer group. Involve siblings in activities too, as it helps maintain a sense of family unity and support.

6. What steps can I take to support my child’s emotional health?

Emotional health is as critical as physical care, and creating a supportive environment is key. Predictable routines around medical appointments and treatments can help reduce anxiety. When frustration or anger arises, provide healthy outlets—like a "mad list" of acceptable ways to vent, such as punching a pillow or scribbling on paper. Celebrate small victories to boost their confidence and maintain hope. Additionally, connections with friends and family should be nurtured, whether through in-person visits, video calls, or thoughtful messages. Recognize and acknowledge the unfairness of the situation, but also emphasize resilience and strength.

7. How do I recognize if my child needs professional help?

It is important to stay alert for warning signs that may indicate the need for professional intervention. These include persistent changes in sleep patterns, withdrawal from previously enjoyed activities, excessive worry or fear, aggressive behaviour, significant changes in appetite, or regression in developmental milestones. If you notice these signs, don’t hesitate to seek guidance from a paediatric psychologist or counsellor. Early intervention can make a significant difference in helping your child process their emotions and cope more effectively.

8. How do I take care of myself as a caregiver?

Caregiving can be emotionally and physically draining, and your well-being is just as important as your child’s wellbeing. Remember to set aside time for self-care, whether that is through rest, exercise, or connecting with friends. Lean on your support network when needed, and do not hesitate to seek professional help if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Taking care of yourself ensures that you have the strength and resilience to support your child through their journey.

Cancer is undoubtedly a challenging journey, but children are remarkably resilient when surrounded by love and understanding. Your support, presence, and patience create the foundation for their emotional and physical healing. Celebrate the small wins, trust your instincts, and do not hesitate to reach out for help when needed.

Remember: hope and healing go hand in hand.

Dr. Swathi Krishna
MD FNB
Consultant Cancer Physician
MOC Cancer Care & Research Centre, Ghatkopar & Thane.